Deeply Loved

I was listening to an audio book yesterday while cleaning out the refrigerator called "The Broken Way"by Ann Voskamp.  She is such a descriptive writer!  In the sixth chapter she writes about an idea that I had never thought of before.  The fact that we often talk about believing in God, but that he also believes in us!  Wow!  He knows us better than anyone does since he created us and he also knows what we will face from day to day.  He knows that he is enough for whatever comes our way and he believes in us that we can hold on and even more than merely that, thrive!  He is our righteous judge, our advocate cheering us on whether we think we are succeeding or feel as though we are just a moment away from giving up, throwing in our towel...He has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you", Hebrews 13:5.  His acceptance does not depend on whether we have it all together but that he does have it all together!

An issue that has faced me throughout my life that I cannot make heads or tales no matter how much I try to understand always plagues me in the back of my mind.  It is difficult to let it go...to not get down on myself for it.  I may never come to grasp on all the whys in this life time, but I do know that God knows!  He gets me and the situation, he knows my heart.  Though I have this "thorn in my side" that bruises and breaks my heart on a regular basis, his eyes turn toward mine with great compassion and says, "I know and I see your heart; you  have nothing to fear".

I have not felt believed in myself for much of my life.  I have always felt like I didn't fit, wasn't quite cool enough (whatever that is), not enough...Struggles keep me doubting myself and my abilities, leaving me insecure and wanting to hide in a closet somewhere sometimes.  But God!  The one who made me, the one who sees me, the one who holds and counts every tear, the one who created me also believes in me!  I am thankful for a God that is both powerful, able and willing to help me.  I can trust my just and righteous advocate to stand up for me to the accuser (s)!  I can leave it there and allow myself to do more than just survive, but to thrive until I meet my Savior, my cheerleader, my God face-to-face!  All I need to remind myself...whether it is every minute, every hour, every day;  however often I need to...I am deeply loved...and so are you!  Our God believes in us!  If we get that deep in our hearts, our spirits that is enough to live freely, boldly and fully alive!