If Christ is in us, where is the power? Why are we falling into depression and anxiety? Why is the divorce rate in the church as high as the world? Why are so many of us walking around holding grudges and being offended by others in the church. Where is the power to not only live out a victorious life in Christ, but also a life that influences those around us in a dynamic way? Can those around us even recognize a difference in us? Can they see that we are different in some way? Are we loving as Christ would? Or are we staying in our comfort zones, our own little church cliques? Are we laying down our lives for those around us in tangible, real ways? I ask these questions of myself.
I think of theJews in Susa as mentioned in the book of Esther...they were captives and yet no one could even tell the jews from the gentiles...they had so assimilated into the culture. In our culture uniqueness is not celebrated as much as conformity is mandated. If we do not conform...there is something wrong with us...I think of the scripture that says to be "in the world, but not of it." The scriptures do not call us to conformity, but rather to a life of purity, to live out the uniqueness in which God made us, which is totally anti-cultural. People think you are weird if you do not sleep with your boyfriend/girlfriend before marriage, or disagree with homosexuality, or hate abortion. It is not "politically correct" to believe this way, but whose standards are we exemplyifying? Are we assimilating into the culture to such a degree that we are indiscernible from the rest of the world? This is where our power comes from. To live in the power of Christ and to be so secure in who He called us to be that we are not afraid of criticism from those around us that we walk with such confidence that we can live out the truth without fear...
Thursday, December 23, 2010
A Moment of Musing
I was reflecting today on what I heard at our woman's retreat this past weekend. I am the beloved of the Father, he created me and no matter what I do, he still loves me. He smiles when I am fully functioning in how he created me. Wow! That totally amazes me! I can't believe that the King of Kings and the God of the universe really feels that way about me! I think the sooner I realize that, the sooner my life will be radically changed by that revelation! Boy do I need to really know that at the core of my being. That I would live out of a place of security rather than of fear or comparison with others. That is what I was talking to the other women at my table about yesterday- I struggle with feeling less than with others who seem more "cool". I often feel left out, maybe a throw back to my teenage years when I was made fun of for my clothes or that I didn't measure up to others expectations and was often the "new kid on the block". Isn't it amazing that I stil struggle with that today, over twenty five years ago? I see the effects of that now...instead of discriminating against the poor and those that fit in, I think I discriminate against those that are too "cool" from my perception. I need to change my perceptions because those that think they are cool also need to be loved and accepted, many more so.
It's all about our perceptions. Perceptions are realities in our minds, even if they are not realities in reality- does that make sense? As long as I think it is real, it is real to me and I will live out of that reality. So, if "I call those things that are not as though they were" then my "reality" will have changed and I will live out of that.
That is what we all need...for God to invade our perceptions with the truth. That is why soaking in the truth of His word is so important. His truth IS reality and it will become more of my reality once I accept it and believe it and live it out as though it is truth, because it is!
I am reading Galatian- one of the very first things that Paul says, "I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting the one who called you by the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel- which is really no gospel (good news) at all. Vs 6,7. Wow! If we are following a 'different' gospel as Paul mentions, which is not of grace, it is no gospel at all. How many of us live here, sometimes without realizing or even thinking about it? We put ourselves and everyone else under the law so easily and so quickly...we are called by the grace of Christ! Grace through and through! We are not called to Christ by our performance, our looks, whether we have the right clothes, act according to cultural standards, etceterra...it is all out of the grace of Christ that brought us life. "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." Vs. 10. Do our churches really refect this? Do we put pressure, maybe even more so, in the church to be a certain way, look a certain a way, do cerrtain things, etcetera? Do we really love those around us, failings, weaknesses, mistakes and all. Do we really love ourselves this way? If we did I think we would lose our self-consciousness and would reach out to others without thought of how we would look, whether we should, what will they think, will they receive me, etcetera. No, we would walk out of a place of deep security and therefore a place of immense, quiet, power. Not putting anything on. Just walking out of a peace with ourselves, God, and others. Our effectiveness would exponetially increase because we know who we are and we are loved!
It's all about our perceptions. Perceptions are realities in our minds, even if they are not realities in reality- does that make sense? As long as I think it is real, it is real to me and I will live out of that reality. So, if "I call those things that are not as though they were" then my "reality" will have changed and I will live out of that.
That is what we all need...for God to invade our perceptions with the truth. That is why soaking in the truth of His word is so important. His truth IS reality and it will become more of my reality once I accept it and believe it and live it out as though it is truth, because it is!
I am reading Galatian- one of the very first things that Paul says, "I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting the one who called you by the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel- which is really no gospel (good news) at all. Vs 6,7. Wow! If we are following a 'different' gospel as Paul mentions, which is not of grace, it is no gospel at all. How many of us live here, sometimes without realizing or even thinking about it? We put ourselves and everyone else under the law so easily and so quickly...we are called by the grace of Christ! Grace through and through! We are not called to Christ by our performance, our looks, whether we have the right clothes, act according to cultural standards, etceterra...it is all out of the grace of Christ that brought us life. "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." Vs. 10. Do our churches really refect this? Do we put pressure, maybe even more so, in the church to be a certain way, look a certain a way, do cerrtain things, etcetera? Do we really love those around us, failings, weaknesses, mistakes and all. Do we really love ourselves this way? If we did I think we would lose our self-consciousness and would reach out to others without thought of how we would look, whether we should, what will they think, will they receive me, etcetera. No, we would walk out of a place of deep security and therefore a place of immense, quiet, power. Not putting anything on. Just walking out of a peace with ourselves, God, and others. Our effectiveness would exponetially increase because we know who we are and we are loved!
Christmas?
I have been struggling with Christmas...not in the ways that you might think...
From what I have read, Jesus was not born on December 25th. In fact, it is an impossibility due to the weather in Israel is very cold at this time of year and the shepherds could not have been tending their sheep by night...so, why do we celebrate Christmas on this date?
Well, I have also read that this (and all the other holidays or holy days) that we celebrate here in America are based on pagan traditions. Based on the celebrations of other gods...now, I know that we as christian do not believe in idols so the fact that other gods were originally worshiped or celebrated on these days is a moot point. From what I read it made the conversion to christianity in the roman days "easier", so the newly converted chrisitians could keep all their previous celebrations and "christianize" or maybe sanitize them to be more acceptable to the church or to Christ...
What I am struggling with is that everything we celebrate is based on the traditions that have nothing to do with the actual birth of Christ. I asked my husband the other day if he would like to celebrate his birthday in July instead of February, he didn't seem too keen on the idea...so, why are we celebrating Jesus' birthday in December then?
I do not want to do something just because it is "tradition" or because everyone else is doing it that way...
I have been praying about what Jesus really thinks about Christmas. As one writer mentioned, no where in the Bible is it recommended or commanded that christians have a celebration or feast celebrating the birth of Christ, not that I think that it is wrong to celebrate the birth of Christ, I mean I celebrate the birth of those I love, why should it be any different for my friend Jesus?
I get so frustrated with how we in America celebrate the birth of our Savior...so much commercialism. More stuff that we amass while others go hungry- all, literally, in the name of Christ. I am not judging anyone, for I am in this too, I am guilty too if guilt is to be passed at all.
I just watched "The Singing Christmas Tree", a DVD that a family member sent- a program that was put on by a large christian church in Orlando. Two very large trees are lit up and the lights go in sync with the music. The choir is all positioned through the "branches" of this tree, it was all about glitz. It turned me off. Now I am sure their motive was a good one, but I can't help but think that we have lost sight of who Jesus is...God incarnate, God in the flesh, the almighty, powerful, omnipotent, creator and Lord of all!
I am interested to know more about how chanukah is celebrated, go back to our jewish roots, but I fear it is the same problem of commercialism in that as well.
It goes back to "it is what you make it." Not getting caught up into things without thinking about the whys. Asking questions. The only problem is that sometimes it "ruins" you. My heart is to really think about what and why I believe...
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the Christmas tree, the candlight services, the Christmas songs, the presents, and the feasting and family getting togethers just like the next guy. That is why these thoughts have been a struggle at all...
The question is, "What is in your heart?" "Who do you say that I am?" That is a reminder to each one of us, not just on this "holy" day, but everday of the year...
From what I have read, Jesus was not born on December 25th. In fact, it is an impossibility due to the weather in Israel is very cold at this time of year and the shepherds could not have been tending their sheep by night...so, why do we celebrate Christmas on this date?
Well, I have also read that this (and all the other holidays or holy days) that we celebrate here in America are based on pagan traditions. Based on the celebrations of other gods...now, I know that we as christian do not believe in idols so the fact that other gods were originally worshiped or celebrated on these days is a moot point. From what I read it made the conversion to christianity in the roman days "easier", so the newly converted chrisitians could keep all their previous celebrations and "christianize" or maybe sanitize them to be more acceptable to the church or to Christ...
What I am struggling with is that everything we celebrate is based on the traditions that have nothing to do with the actual birth of Christ. I asked my husband the other day if he would like to celebrate his birthday in July instead of February, he didn't seem too keen on the idea...so, why are we celebrating Jesus' birthday in December then?
I do not want to do something just because it is "tradition" or because everyone else is doing it that way...
I have been praying about what Jesus really thinks about Christmas. As one writer mentioned, no where in the Bible is it recommended or commanded that christians have a celebration or feast celebrating the birth of Christ, not that I think that it is wrong to celebrate the birth of Christ, I mean I celebrate the birth of those I love, why should it be any different for my friend Jesus?
I get so frustrated with how we in America celebrate the birth of our Savior...so much commercialism. More stuff that we amass while others go hungry- all, literally, in the name of Christ. I am not judging anyone, for I am in this too, I am guilty too if guilt is to be passed at all.
I am interested to know more about how chanukah is celebrated, go back to our jewish roots, but I fear it is the same problem of commercialism in that as well.
It goes back to "it is what you make it." Not getting caught up into things without thinking about the whys. Asking questions. The only problem is that sometimes it "ruins" you. My heart is to really think about what and why I believe...
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the Christmas tree, the candlight services, the Christmas songs, the presents, and the feasting and family getting togethers just like the next guy. That is why these thoughts have been a struggle at all...
The question is, "What is in your heart?" "Who do you say that I am?" That is a reminder to each one of us, not just on this "holy" day, but everday of the year...
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Responsibilty
Responsibility takes a very high level of importance for me...I like how Dave described it, "Able to respond." Wow, that's good. When we respond appropriately we then have more freedoms. We can be trusted. Sometimes we have to reign in ourselves until we are able to discipline ourselves in a certain area...this is not about rules, but again, not all things are the very best for us. Not all things bring us to our highest goals. Our divine destiny...
Are we living out of our identity or are we living to prove our identity? We don't have anything to prove. Our Father God loves us through and through! Who cares what other's think? Why do we care so much anyway? I have struggled with comparing myself for so long...someone prettier, more popular, richer, more stylish, more of whatever I think I do not have...why do I do this to myself? Jesus, I need you to show me more of who you are- love, and who I am- loved! We find our identity in Christ alone. We don't need to be addicted to drugs, alcohol, sex, food, popularity, etcetera, we need the divine addiction. The God-filled obsession! When we believe what we read in God's love letter to us- our emancipation proclamation, we can be all that God intended for us without pride or arrogance, a right concept of ourselves, loved no matter what by the most important person around...how much better can it get?
Are we living out of our identity or are we living to prove our identity? We don't have anything to prove. Our Father God loves us through and through! Who cares what other's think? Why do we care so much anyway? I have struggled with comparing myself for so long...someone prettier, more popular, richer, more stylish, more of whatever I think I do not have...why do I do this to myself? Jesus, I need you to show me more of who you are- love, and who I am- loved! We find our identity in Christ alone. We don't need to be addicted to drugs, alcohol, sex, food, popularity, etcetera, we need the divine addiction. The God-filled obsession! When we believe what we read in God's love letter to us- our emancipation proclamation, we can be all that God intended for us without pride or arrogance, a right concept of ourselves, loved no matter what by the most important person around...how much better can it get?
Daddy...
Today is a new day...and I have a new revelation of just how much my Father God loves me! He is so sweet, so precious, so present when I need to know that he is here, that he is near. I have looked at my walk with him in such a way that frequently it did not bring life to me at all. I have compared him to my earthly parent's. They are humans and they have their weaknesses. He (as he revealed to me last night) is NOT like anyone else on the earth. I cannot compare him to my parents. He so fully loves me that I will never be able to comprehend it. At our home group we sat before the Lord in silence for a few minutes. It was beautiful! The warmth of the living room along with the scented evergreen candle wafting through the air was so cozy. I sat in a chair and had my feet up and felt like I was resting my head on the Father's chest as tears flowed freely. Not tears of remorse or shame...but tears of understanding...He is not out to bang the gavel down, hoping that I fail so that he can place judgement on me. No, He is wanting me to experience life in all it's fullness. He gives commands not because he is just a rule maker, but because he knows what will bring life. He wants life for us even more than we do, life that we cannot even imagine in our finite minds. He sees what our choices that go against him do- they bring different degrees of death. I think of what God said in the Garden of Eden..."Do not eat of the tree of good and evil" He knew what would happen, we would experience a kind of death, to our souls, to our purpose, to the divine destiny that he ultimately had in store for us. Satan made it out like God was holding out on us or just didn't want us to have the best that we could have, he is such a liar! We still believe those lies rather than believe that God is truly for us and not against us! Why do we still choose to believe the father of lies over the very one who created us and gave us life in the first place?
We live our lives out of a place of managing sin. Is that really a place of abundant life? Is that really freedom? God's word tells us that "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free, do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." Slavery to what? To sin, to having to be a certain way to tow the line or to conform to what others think we ought to be. No, Christ has made us unique for a purpose, he has a plan for us, "Plans to prosper us and not to harm us, to give us a future and a hope." Do we really believe that? I mean really believe that? I know that scripture by heart, but has my self-talk reflected the truth of that word? His word says that "All things are permissible, but not all things are beneficial". Is that really in God's word? You bet! We are free to do anything, but not all things will bring life to us. It is not about keeping a list of dos and don'ts. It is about do I want the peace that God offers? Do I want to live fully in His love? Do I want all that he has for me? Yes, I want it ALL! What do I have to do to receive ALL that he has for me? Just believe that the Good News is really good news! That "He came to bring life and life more abundantly!" If we live his word, we will experience life to the fullest!
No more have to's...I have to read my Bible. I have to pray. I don't necessarily say it like that, but that is what I am feeling- the pressure to do this or that...No, I want to read his word because that is where I find life, that is where I find Jesus, the giver of life. I want to pray because I want to talk to Jesus about my day just as I would with a good friend, not putting on airs, not putting on a spiritual voice just for him- no, just being me, he already knows who I am anyway, after all he created me. I can talk to him or not talk to him, but it is me that will lose out on friendship for that time or season...the very thing that I need so desperately! He is not judging me, but ready to meet me whenever I am ready..."He is ever present in my time of need." It doesn't say only when I behave according to some religious code. He didn't have a religious code, that was the pharisees and the Sadducee's that abided by such rules that they made it difficult for anyone to come to God. Our way to God is simple, through Jesus. Period. He made a way where there seemed to be no way!
I will choose today and each day thereafter to live in my Daddy's love. I will choose to reject the religious culture of our day, or judgements that others place upon me and just live my life to the fullest knowing that my Father is pleased with me. "He loves me with an everlasting love" and no one else can give me that kind of unconditional love for all eternity. Daddy I love you too! Ready or not here I come...I'm jumping onto your lap and I am going to stay there where I can hear the stillness of your breath, hear you whisper in my ear...where I am safe from whatever the world has to throw at me- "In this world you WILL have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome the world!" As long as I am with Him, my heart is safe. As long as I am with him, no one can say anything bad about me. As long as I am in with him I can be FULL of joy and not offended. What a thought, if I am not living in a place of joy and I am easily offended, I truly do not know of His love for me..."Taste and see that the Lord is good!" If I see Him as good it will color everything I see...it will change how I see others. It will change how I see sin. It will change everything!
Again, as long as I am with Him, my heart is safe! "Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!"
We live our lives out of a place of managing sin. Is that really a place of abundant life? Is that really freedom? God's word tells us that "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free, do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." Slavery to what? To sin, to having to be a certain way to tow the line or to conform to what others think we ought to be. No, Christ has made us unique for a purpose, he has a plan for us, "Plans to prosper us and not to harm us, to give us a future and a hope." Do we really believe that? I mean really believe that? I know that scripture by heart, but has my self-talk reflected the truth of that word? His word says that "All things are permissible, but not all things are beneficial". Is that really in God's word? You bet! We are free to do anything, but not all things will bring life to us. It is not about keeping a list of dos and don'ts. It is about do I want the peace that God offers? Do I want to live fully in His love? Do I want all that he has for me? Yes, I want it ALL! What do I have to do to receive ALL that he has for me? Just believe that the Good News is really good news! That "He came to bring life and life more abundantly!" If we live his word, we will experience life to the fullest!
No more have to's...I have to read my Bible. I have to pray. I don't necessarily say it like that, but that is what I am feeling- the pressure to do this or that...No, I want to read his word because that is where I find life, that is where I find Jesus, the giver of life. I want to pray because I want to talk to Jesus about my day just as I would with a good friend, not putting on airs, not putting on a spiritual voice just for him- no, just being me, he already knows who I am anyway, after all he created me. I can talk to him or not talk to him, but it is me that will lose out on friendship for that time or season...the very thing that I need so desperately! He is not judging me, but ready to meet me whenever I am ready..."He is ever present in my time of need." It doesn't say only when I behave according to some religious code. He didn't have a religious code, that was the pharisees and the Sadducee's that abided by such rules that they made it difficult for anyone to come to God. Our way to God is simple, through Jesus. Period. He made a way where there seemed to be no way!
I will choose today and each day thereafter to live in my Daddy's love. I will choose to reject the religious culture of our day, or judgements that others place upon me and just live my life to the fullest knowing that my Father is pleased with me. "He loves me with an everlasting love" and no one else can give me that kind of unconditional love for all eternity. Daddy I love you too! Ready or not here I come...I'm jumping onto your lap and I am going to stay there where I can hear the stillness of your breath, hear you whisper in my ear...where I am safe from whatever the world has to throw at me- "In this world you WILL have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome the world!" As long as I am with Him, my heart is safe. As long as I am with him, no one can say anything bad about me. As long as I am in with him I can be FULL of joy and not offended. What a thought, if I am not living in a place of joy and I am easily offended, I truly do not know of His love for me..."Taste and see that the Lord is good!" If I see Him as good it will color everything I see...it will change how I see others. It will change how I see sin. It will change everything!
Again, as long as I am with Him, my heart is safe! "Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!"
Monday, December 13, 2010
The If's
How many times in a day do we say the word 'If'? If I lived there I would be happier. If I had this or that I could do this or that...I commented to a friend at coffee today that 'If' is really a irrelevant word, she said yeah if stands for "Irrevelant fear" because so many of our ifs are based in fears and not truly living in the moment...or how about "Idiotic fantasy"? That's a good one too- we let all our ifs hold us back...it is not relevant because it is not what really is...our ifs do not deal with the present reality and because of that we either are disillusioned or we are held back because our 'ifs' have not yet happened, if, ha ha, they ever will...they keep us stuck either in the past or the future, but not in the moment.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Jesus says C'mon
Jesus you are so loving, kind, and so patient with many of my silly ideas...but you don't even see them that way because you know they are leading me to your very heart, getting closer...
At home group tonight we talked about the whole concept of God erasing the lines...we have these unspoken lines, every one of us has them and it is not until we are pushed over them through trials...that we even know that they are there. Those things that we can't handle, the "last straw" so to speak- whether we get upset with others or with God. Those areas that we are judging ourselves we are also judging others. The trials that James talks about are not from God, but rather from just living life, our own choices, or even satan...God uses the testing of our faith...to deepen our trust in Him if we come to Him in the midst of them..."Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." Wow, what a concept, to not lack anything...James continues on..."If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt." God gives irregardless of where we are at, the only thing is is that we have to believe and not doubt. Wow, that is truly a work of the Holy Spirit...how can we not doubt when we are going through really hard things? We come to God, we ask for more of the power of the Holy Spirit, we cannot do it without him! He is not looking for fault in us, it is us that is seeing our faults and then shrinking back believing that we are not good enough to come to Him in the first place because of our sin, our failures, etcetera...Also, He does not say that the thing we are going through is joyous, He is saying to consider it joy- only because we trust that God can make something good come out of something ugly and difficult.
Last week I was thinking how my thoughts of God are actually idolatrous because they are not true representations of who He really is...but as Dave pointed out to me, that does not bother God...all He cares about is that I come to Him. It is not doing Him a disservice because my thoughts about Him are inaccurate...it does me the disservice and I will not live in the freedom that He has for me, I will not be in the fullness of who He is. We are all on a journey though...some live in greater levels of freedom than others, but we are all on that road and we are getting closer. God accepts us exactly where we are- He knows why we are there and He keeps calling us to come closer, to go deeper, to bring all of who we are, all our worries, our fears, our crap and lay it at His feet, He understands it all and still receives us and accepts us. Why is that concept so hard to get? We all carry a picture of our Father God from our growing up...sometimes we need to see the truth and live it even though it doesn't feel like it is the truth, maybe pretend that it is and it will prove itself in time...this whole journey is not about expecting more from me, not about me doing more, or putting myself in crazy gyrations so I can be closer, it is the work of the Holy Spirit. I just need to make myself more available..."More Lord!"
Our relationships frequently don't go well because we have a right or wrong thinking. If I am right, then you are wrong and vica versa...no, we are different because God made us that way...we need to pray and ask God to show us how He delights in that other person and ask Him to help us see them the way He does, that we too would delight in them so we can come to a place of respecting their differences, it is really an issue of faith and trusting in God. It is not for us to demand that others must be like me...we are all unique, just the way that God created us and we are different for a reason, seek the power of the Holy Spirit to remember that God intentionally made him (let's say my husband), and he intentionally made me.
We can become disillusioned when our life does not match up with our vision of what the promise of an "abundant life" looks like. The funny thing is that we get hung up on that, but we forget that God is God and that the abundant life is not defined by me, but by God. Who knows what the abundant life really looks like in the spirit? Will I trust Him to provide that for me? Will I trust that He is truly good? Why do I have such a hard time receiving what I have been given? My vision of my life doesn't always match up with what really is...when we butt up against what God's call and will for my life are not matching up with everything I think it should be then what am I left with? Bitterness and resentment, the exact opposite of an abundant life. How about accepting and receiving what He gives to me, trust Him that He knows the needs, the wants, the dreams of my heart...how about I stop fighting with Him and begin receiving?
Just imagine, I mean really imagine if God were truly all that you thought He was, that He was as good as you could ever imagine and then some, how would that radically change your life? Would that change how you see yourself? How about others? How about how you live your life? He is that! He is all that and more!!! I want all that You have for me Father! I want you to meet with me so that I can be changed into a new woman, a woman of grace, truth, and love. For the greatest of these is love! It's not about success or failure, it's about being with you and knowing your 100% acceptance of me just as I am! If I could get a glimmer of this in the depths of my spirit, I would be a changed woman. 1 Samuel 10:6-7 "The Spirit of the Lord will come upon you in power, and you will prophesy with them; and you will be changed into a different person. Once these signs are fulfilled, do whatever your hand finds to do, for God is with you."
At home group tonight we talked about the whole concept of God erasing the lines...we have these unspoken lines, every one of us has them and it is not until we are pushed over them through trials...that we even know that they are there. Those things that we can't handle, the "last straw" so to speak- whether we get upset with others or with God. Those areas that we are judging ourselves we are also judging others. The trials that James talks about are not from God, but rather from just living life, our own choices, or even satan...God uses the testing of our faith...to deepen our trust in Him if we come to Him in the midst of them..."Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." Wow, what a concept, to not lack anything...James continues on..."If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt." God gives irregardless of where we are at, the only thing is is that we have to believe and not doubt. Wow, that is truly a work of the Holy Spirit...how can we not doubt when we are going through really hard things? We come to God, we ask for more of the power of the Holy Spirit, we cannot do it without him! He is not looking for fault in us, it is us that is seeing our faults and then shrinking back believing that we are not good enough to come to Him in the first place because of our sin, our failures, etcetera...Also, He does not say that the thing we are going through is joyous, He is saying to consider it joy- only because we trust that God can make something good come out of something ugly and difficult.
Last week I was thinking how my thoughts of God are actually idolatrous because they are not true representations of who He really is...but as Dave pointed out to me, that does not bother God...all He cares about is that I come to Him. It is not doing Him a disservice because my thoughts about Him are inaccurate...it does me the disservice and I will not live in the freedom that He has for me, I will not be in the fullness of who He is. We are all on a journey though...some live in greater levels of freedom than others, but we are all on that road and we are getting closer. God accepts us exactly where we are- He knows why we are there and He keeps calling us to come closer, to go deeper, to bring all of who we are, all our worries, our fears, our crap and lay it at His feet, He understands it all and still receives us and accepts us. Why is that concept so hard to get? We all carry a picture of our Father God from our growing up...sometimes we need to see the truth and live it even though it doesn't feel like it is the truth, maybe pretend that it is and it will prove itself in time...this whole journey is not about expecting more from me, not about me doing more, or putting myself in crazy gyrations so I can be closer, it is the work of the Holy Spirit. I just need to make myself more available..."More Lord!"
Our relationships frequently don't go well because we have a right or wrong thinking. If I am right, then you are wrong and vica versa...no, we are different because God made us that way...we need to pray and ask God to show us how He delights in that other person and ask Him to help us see them the way He does, that we too would delight in them so we can come to a place of respecting their differences, it is really an issue of faith and trusting in God. It is not for us to demand that others must be like me...we are all unique, just the way that God created us and we are different for a reason, seek the power of the Holy Spirit to remember that God intentionally made him (let's say my husband), and he intentionally made me.
We can become disillusioned when our life does not match up with our vision of what the promise of an "abundant life" looks like. The funny thing is that we get hung up on that, but we forget that God is God and that the abundant life is not defined by me, but by God. Who knows what the abundant life really looks like in the spirit? Will I trust Him to provide that for me? Will I trust that He is truly good? Why do I have such a hard time receiving what I have been given? My vision of my life doesn't always match up with what really is...when we butt up against what God's call and will for my life are not matching up with everything I think it should be then what am I left with? Bitterness and resentment, the exact opposite of an abundant life. How about accepting and receiving what He gives to me, trust Him that He knows the needs, the wants, the dreams of my heart...how about I stop fighting with Him and begin receiving?
Just imagine, I mean really imagine if God were truly all that you thought He was, that He was as good as you could ever imagine and then some, how would that radically change your life? Would that change how you see yourself? How about others? How about how you live your life? He is that! He is all that and more!!! I want all that You have for me Father! I want you to meet with me so that I can be changed into a new woman, a woman of grace, truth, and love. For the greatest of these is love! It's not about success or failure, it's about being with you and knowing your 100% acceptance of me just as I am! If I could get a glimmer of this in the depths of my spirit, I would be a changed woman. 1 Samuel 10:6-7 "The Spirit of the Lord will come upon you in power, and you will prophesy with them; and you will be changed into a different person. Once these signs are fulfilled, do whatever your hand finds to do, for God is with you."
Quotes and Thoughts...
I am reading George MacDonald's book "The Curate of Glaston", what a deep "fiction" book. I love it! I wanted to write some things down..."Wingfold was not one to take offense easily. He was not important enough in his own eyes for that, and he decided to let the matter drop." "Let me just ask if you have not already found in that book the highest means of spiritual education and development you have yet met with? It is the man Christ Jesus we have to know, and the Bible we must use to that end- not the theory or dogma. in that light, it is the most practical and useful book in the world.- But let me tell you a strange dream I had not long ago." "There stood the beloved disciple (in Polwarth's dream)! His countenance was as a mirror which shone back the face of the Master. Slowly he lifted the book and and turned away. Then I saw behind him as it were an altar where a fire of wood was about to do. he laid the book on teh burning wood, and regarded it with a smile as it shrank and shriveled and smouldered to ashes. Then he turned to me and said, while a perfect heaven of peace shone in his eyes: 'Son of man, the Word of God lives and abides forever, not in the volume of the book, but in the heart of the man that in love obeys him.' "Why do you call me Lord, Lord, and do not the things which I say?" "Here I am bothering over words, and questioning about this and that, as if I were examining his fitness for a job, while he has all the while been claiming my obedience! I have not once in my life done a single thing because he told me.- But then, how am I to obey him until I am sure of his right to command? I just want to know whether I am to call him Lord or not. Here I have all these years been calling myself a Christian, even ministering in the temple of Christ as if he were some heathen divinity who cared for songs and prayers and sacrifices, and yet I cannot honestly say I ever once in my life did a thing because he said so. I have not been an honest man! And I thought to myself, 'Have I today done a single thing he has said to me? When was the last time I did something I heard from him? Did I ever in all my life do one thing because he said to me, "Do this?" and the answer was, 'No, never.' Yet there I was, not only calling myself a Christian, but presuming to live among you and be your helper on the road toward the heavenly kingdom. What a living lie I have been!"
"The Lord says, 'Love your enemies.' Do you say, 'It is impossible'? do you say, 'Alas, I cannot? but have you tried to see whether he who made you will not increase your stength when you step out to obey him? The Lord says, 'Be perfect.' , Do you then aim for perfection, or do you excuse your shortcomings and say, "To err is human'? If so, then you must ask yourself what part you have in him. The Lord says, 'Lay up for yourselves treasures on earth.' My part is not now to preach against the love ofm oney, but to ask you, 'Are you laying up for yourselves treasures on earth?" As to what the command means, the honest heart and the dishonest must each settle it in his own way. No doubt you can point to other men who are no better than you, and of whom yet no one would dare question the validity of their Christiananity. but all that matters not a hair. All that does is confirm that you may all be pagans together. Do not mistake me. I am not judging you. For my finger points at myself along with you. but I ask simply to judge yourselves by the words of Jesus. The Lord say, 'Take no thought for your life. Take no thought for tomorrow.' Explain it as you may, but ask yourselves, 'Do I take no thought for my life? Do I take no thought for tomorrow?' The Lord says, 'Judge not'. Did you judge your neighbor yesterday? Will you judge him aain tomorrow? Are you judging him now in the very heart that sits hearing the words, 'Judge not'? Or do you side step the command by asking, 'Who is my neighbor?' Does not your own profession of Christianainity counsel you to fall upon your face, and cry to him, 'I am a sinful man, O Lord'? The Lord said, 'All things you would that men should do to you, do also to them.' You that buy and sell, do you obey this law? Examine yourselves and see. You would want men to deal fairly to you; do you deal juast as fairly to them as you would count fairness in them toward you? If conscience makes you hang your head inwardly, however you sit with it erect in the pew, can you dare to add to your crime against the law and the prophets the insult to Christ of calling yourselves his disciples? not every onethat says unto me, "Lord, Lord," shall enter into the kingdom of heaven, but he that does the will of my Father who is in heaven."
"Tossed he was in spirit, calling even aloud sometimes to know if there was a god anywhere hearing his prayer. He was sure only of this, that whatever else any being might be, if he heard not prayer, he could not be God. Sometimes there came to him what he would gladly have taken for an answer, but it was nothing more than a sudden descent of calmness on his spirit, which, for anything he could tell, might but be the calm of exhaustion. His knees were sore with kneeling, his face white with thinking, for when a man has set out to find god, he must find him or die."
"The Lord says, 'Love your enemies.' Do you say, 'It is impossible'? do you say, 'Alas, I cannot? but have you tried to see whether he who made you will not increase your stength when you step out to obey him? The Lord says, 'Be perfect.' , Do you then aim for perfection, or do you excuse your shortcomings and say, "To err is human'? If so, then you must ask yourself what part you have in him. The Lord says, 'Lay up for yourselves treasures on earth.' My part is not now to preach against the love ofm oney, but to ask you, 'Are you laying up for yourselves treasures on earth?" As to what the command means, the honest heart and the dishonest must each settle it in his own way. No doubt you can point to other men who are no better than you, and of whom yet no one would dare question the validity of their Christiananity. but all that matters not a hair. All that does is confirm that you may all be pagans together. Do not mistake me. I am not judging you. For my finger points at myself along with you. but I ask simply to judge yourselves by the words of Jesus. The Lord say, 'Take no thought for your life. Take no thought for tomorrow.' Explain it as you may, but ask yourselves, 'Do I take no thought for my life? Do I take no thought for tomorrow?' The Lord says, 'Judge not'. Did you judge your neighbor yesterday? Will you judge him aain tomorrow? Are you judging him now in the very heart that sits hearing the words, 'Judge not'? Or do you side step the command by asking, 'Who is my neighbor?' Does not your own profession of Christianainity counsel you to fall upon your face, and cry to him, 'I am a sinful man, O Lord'? The Lord said, 'All things you would that men should do to you, do also to them.' You that buy and sell, do you obey this law? Examine yourselves and see. You would want men to deal fairly to you; do you deal juast as fairly to them as you would count fairness in them toward you? If conscience makes you hang your head inwardly, however you sit with it erect in the pew, can you dare to add to your crime against the law and the prophets the insult to Christ of calling yourselves his disciples? not every onethat says unto me, "Lord, Lord," shall enter into the kingdom of heaven, but he that does the will of my Father who is in heaven."
"Tossed he was in spirit, calling even aloud sometimes to know if there was a god anywhere hearing his prayer. He was sure only of this, that whatever else any being might be, if he heard not prayer, he could not be God. Sometimes there came to him what he would gladly have taken for an answer, but it was nothing more than a sudden descent of calmness on his spirit, which, for anything he could tell, might but be the calm of exhaustion. His knees were sore with kneeling, his face white with thinking, for when a man has set out to find god, he must find him or die."
Friday, December 3, 2010
The Nature of an Inheritance
The nature of an inheritance is that one day you don't have it and another day you do. If someone was to call me up and tell me that my grandfather had passed away and that I had a million dollars in the bank what would I say? How would I feel? If I just left the money in the bank and did not pursue how to get it out, would I be any richer, no. I need to get it. I need to act on the information that I have just received. Now before that telephone call I had very little money and no knowledge that I would be getting a phone call informing me of my inheritance. This information would change everything wouldn't it? I would have to ask not only how do I obtain it, but, how will I spend it. Will I pay off all my debts? Will I give some of it away? Will I put some in the bank for "a rainy day?"
Thursday, December 2, 2010
The Love of God
Love (per Webster's dictionary): A deep and tender feeling of affection for or attachment or devotion to a person or persons. An expression of one's love or affection. A strong liking or interest in something. God's tender regard and concern for mankind. Mankind's devotion to and desire for God as the supreme good. To feel love for. To delight in, take pleasure in. To feel the emotion of love. Affection: suggests warm, tender feeelings, usually not as powerful or as deep as those implied by love.
So I decided that I would look up all the times that LOVE is mentioned in God's Word, it is 551 times. So this is my not so exhaustive selective reference list to remind myself just how much God loves me!
Ex 15:13 "In your unfailing love you will lead the people you have redeemed. In your strength you will guide them to your holy dwelling."
Ex 34:6 "The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin."
Dt 7:9 "Know therefore that the Lord you God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands."
"FOR HE IS GOOD, HIS LOVE ENDURES FOREVER." Mentioned numerous times over and over!
Neh 1:5 "O Lord, God of heaven, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with those who love him and obey his commnads..."
Neh 9:17 "But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love."
Ps 13:5 "But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation."
Ps 23:6 "Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."
Ps 26:3 "For your love is ever before me, and I will walk continually in your truth."
Ps 31:21 "Praise be to the Lord, for he showed his wonderful love to me."
Ps 32:10 "The Lord's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him."
Ps 33:5 "The Lord loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love."
Ps 36:5 "Your love, O Lord, reachest to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies."
Ps 36:7 "How priceless is your unfailing love!"
Ps 52:8 "I trust in God's unfailing love for ever and ever."
Ps 63:3 "Because your love is better than life..."
Ps 69:16 "Answer me, O Lord, out of the goodness of your love; in your great mercy turn to me."
Ps 86:5 "You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you."
Ps 89:2 "I wil declare that your love stands firm forever, that you established your faithfulness in heaven itself."
Ps 90:14 "Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days."
Ps 94:18 "When I said, "My foot is slipping," your love, O Lord, supported me."
Ps 98:3 "He has remembered his love and his faithfulness to the house of Israel; all the ends of the earth have seen the salvation of our God."
Ps 100:5 "For the Lord is good and his love endures forevere; his faithfulness continues through all generations."
Ps 103:1-5 "Praise the Lord, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits- who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases; who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's."
Ps 103:8 "The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love."
Ps 103:11-14,17 "For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him: as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust...but from everlasting to everlasting the Lord's love is with those who fear him.
Ps 106:45 "For their sake he remembered his covenant and out of his great love he relented."
Ps 107:43 "Whoever is wise, let him heed these things and consider the great love of the Lord.
Ps 108:6 "Save us and hlep us with your right hand, that those you love may be delivered."
Ps 117:1,2 "Praise the Lord, all you nations; extol him, all you peoples. For great is his love toward us, and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever."
Ps 119:41 "May your unfailing love come to me, O Lord, your salvation according to your promise."
Ps 119:64 "The earth is filled with your love, O Lord; teach me your decrees."
Ps 119:76 "May your unfailing love be my comfort."
Ps 119:124 "Deal with your servant according to your love and teach me your decrees."
Ps 119:132 "Turn to me and have merrcy on me, as you always do to those who love your name."
Ps 119:159 'Preserve my life, O Lord, according to your love."
Ps 138:8 "The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever-"
Ps 143:8 "Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you."
Ps 143:12 "In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes, for I am your servant."
Ps 145:8,9 "The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. The Lord is good to all; he has compassion on all he has made."
Ps 147:11 "The Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love."
Pr 10:12 "Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs."
Pr 17:9 "He who covers over an offense promotes love..."
Pr 19:22 "What a man desires is unfailing love..."
SS 2:4 "He has taken me to the banquet hall, and his banner over me is love."
SS 8:7 "Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away."
Is 54:10 "Yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed," says the Lord, who has compassion on you.
Jer 31:3 "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness.
La 3:22,23 "Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."
Da 9:4 "O Lord, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with all who love him and obey his commands."
Hos 10:12 "Sow for yourselves righteousness, reap the fruit of unfailing love."
Hos 11:4 "I led them with cords of human kindness, with ties of love..."
Joel 2:13 "Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity."
Jnh 4:2 "I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity."
Zeph 3:17 "The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."
Jn 11:3 "Lord, the one you love is sick."
Jn 13:1 "Having loved his own who were in the world, he now showed them the full extent of his love."
Jn 13:34 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another."
So I decided that I would look up all the times that LOVE is mentioned in God's Word, it is 551 times. So this is my not so exhaustive selective reference list to remind myself just how much God loves me!
Ex 15:13 "In your unfailing love you will lead the people you have redeemed. In your strength you will guide them to your holy dwelling."
Ex 34:6 "The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin."
Dt 7:9 "Know therefore that the Lord you God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands."
"FOR HE IS GOOD, HIS LOVE ENDURES FOREVER." Mentioned numerous times over and over!
Neh 1:5 "O Lord, God of heaven, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with those who love him and obey his commnads..."
Neh 9:17 "But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love."
Ps 13:5 "But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation."
Ps 23:6 "Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."
Ps 26:3 "For your love is ever before me, and I will walk continually in your truth."
Ps 31:21 "Praise be to the Lord, for he showed his wonderful love to me."
Ps 32:10 "The Lord's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him."
Ps 33:5 "The Lord loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love."
Ps 36:5 "Your love, O Lord, reachest to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies."
Ps 36:7 "How priceless is your unfailing love!"
Ps 52:8 "I trust in God's unfailing love for ever and ever."
Ps 63:3 "Because your love is better than life..."
Ps 69:16 "Answer me, O Lord, out of the goodness of your love; in your great mercy turn to me."
Ps 86:5 "You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you."
Ps 89:2 "I wil declare that your love stands firm forever, that you established your faithfulness in heaven itself."
Ps 90:14 "Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days."
Ps 94:18 "When I said, "My foot is slipping," your love, O Lord, supported me."
Ps 98:3 "He has remembered his love and his faithfulness to the house of Israel; all the ends of the earth have seen the salvation of our God."
Ps 100:5 "For the Lord is good and his love endures forevere; his faithfulness continues through all generations."
Ps 103:1-5 "Praise the Lord, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits- who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases; who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's."
Ps 103:8 "The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love."
Ps 103:11-14,17 "For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him: as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust...but from everlasting to everlasting the Lord's love is with those who fear him.
Ps 106:45 "For their sake he remembered his covenant and out of his great love he relented."
Ps 107:43 "Whoever is wise, let him heed these things and consider the great love of the Lord.
Ps 108:6 "Save us and hlep us with your right hand, that those you love may be delivered."
Ps 117:1,2 "Praise the Lord, all you nations; extol him, all you peoples. For great is his love toward us, and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever."
Ps 119:41 "May your unfailing love come to me, O Lord, your salvation according to your promise."
Ps 119:64 "The earth is filled with your love, O Lord; teach me your decrees."
Ps 119:76 "May your unfailing love be my comfort."
Ps 119:124 "Deal with your servant according to your love and teach me your decrees."
Ps 119:132 "Turn to me and have merrcy on me, as you always do to those who love your name."
Ps 119:159 'Preserve my life, O Lord, according to your love."
Ps 138:8 "The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever-"
Ps 143:8 "Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you."
Ps 143:12 "In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes, for I am your servant."
Ps 145:8,9 "The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. The Lord is good to all; he has compassion on all he has made."
Ps 147:11 "The Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love."
Pr 10:12 "Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs."
Pr 17:9 "He who covers over an offense promotes love..."
Pr 19:22 "What a man desires is unfailing love..."
SS 2:4 "He has taken me to the banquet hall, and his banner over me is love."
SS 8:7 "Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away."
Is 54:10 "Yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed," says the Lord, who has compassion on you.
Jer 31:3 "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness.
La 3:22,23 "Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."
Da 9:4 "O Lord, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with all who love him and obey his commands."
Hos 10:12 "Sow for yourselves righteousness, reap the fruit of unfailing love."
Hos 11:4 "I led them with cords of human kindness, with ties of love..."
Joel 2:13 "Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity."
Jnh 4:2 "I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity."
Zeph 3:17 "The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."
Jn 11:3 "Lord, the one you love is sick."
Jn 13:1 "Having loved his own who were in the world, he now showed them the full extent of his love."
Jn 13:34 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another."
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
The Divine Romance
Jesus loves me! No, I am not kidding, it's not just what the song says, it is the truth! Why has it taken me so long to get this? I don't think I have really realized that I have never really believed this. Yeah, I thought I believed it, but my life didn't really prove that I believed it...I have lived as though I am on a test of seeing whether I would do more right than wrong. Whether I am a good person based on what I have done. I have felt as though I am constantly being graded and ultimately judged on my performance. That is the world that we live in isn't it? From growing up, to our jobs, everything. Everywhere I go I feel like I am not doing what everyone expects me to do. The problem is that it is different depending on who you talk to and what mood they are in that day. "My yoke is easy and my burden is light, take my yoke upon me for I am meek and gentle of heart." Wow! If my yoke is feeling heavy, it isn't the one that Jesus put upon me, it's probably one that someone has put on me and I have accepted it as my "lot". Even my own expectations of myself changes from minute to minute. Even the church, maybe especially the church reminds me on how I am deficient. I don't serve enough or look a certain way or whatever...That is not God! He created me and knows my weakness, my failures, my anointings and giftings. He knows all there is to know about me. He knows when I will fail and when I will succeed and yet He loves me still! "There is therefore now no condemnation to those that are in Christ Jesus." I was just thinking about that verse- it doesn't say, "There is no condemnation if...you don't lie, steal, gossip, complain, get angry, or fill in the blank. No, he says "There is therefore now no condemnation..." No conditions except to be in Christ. I've never really noticed the absence of things in that verse before now.
Once I really get the revelation downloaded into my mind, heart, and soul- lookout! I will be so completely changed that I will not be recognizable. I will be unoffendable. I will fail and not go into self pity and shame. I will be real- integrity- being true to who I am on the outside with who I am on the inside. Integrity is not about doing the right thing, it's about being real from the inside out. Authenticity! This is me, nothing to hide, because I am the daughter of God. I have great purpose and meaning in my life because God put me here on this earth for a reason. I may not always know or understand what it is, but God knows and I can trust Him.
The religious spirit is insidious. It is a false relationship. It is not authenticity. It appears to be one thing on the outside, but is something totally different on the inside. It is fake. It is not life-giving. It is ugly. It brings judgement. It takes away freedom. "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Do not be burdened again by a yoke a slavery." Why would Christ say this? Would Christ set us free only to become enslaved again to the law once we were saved? That would be ridiculous! That would be stupid! If we are expecting accolades, compliments, etcetera while serving, are we truly serving or feeding our egos? Servants just do their master's bidding- because that is what is expected! Slavery is not glamorous! It is dirty. It is monotonous. It can be boring. Satan uses whatever he can to keep us from a true, authentic relationship with our loving and good God. He will use temptations of all sorts, whichever ones appeal to us the most...pleasures, money, power, fame, even our desire to get it right. It is not about being right or getting it right, it is about coming to Christ, not just the first time when we give our hearts over to Christ on that day of salvation when we accepted Christ initially, no, but, coming to Christ again, and again, and again, in a loving relationship with Him. He wants to be wanted as John and Stasi Eldridge say in their book "Captivating." What a thought, He waits to be wanted...by me? I think why would He want me? I mean really want me? Somehow I don't think I am good enough to come to Him (and I am right, I am not, but Christ has already made a way where there seemed to be no way.) I think surely God wants Becki, Jayne, or Dave....but me? Yes, me! In all my idiosyncrasies...in all my weirdness...in my nerdness...all of me. Wow, if I could only get this deep in my heart of hearts.
A prayer I often pray is, "Lord, help me to see who You really are, not who I think You are, an idol of my own making." My view of God has been distorted for a very, very long time and I want to know the love and freedom that He has for me. How have I missed all the passages in His word about His love for me before? Before when I did hear them or read them they would bounce off like a trampoline, but they wouldn't get inside where they would change me, truly change me. Where they would change the way I see myself, my God, and everyone else around me. When I understand His love then I really understand His grace as well because they both go together like a hand in glove. And when I understand His love and grace it is then that I understand the freedom that He has purchased for me, not just the eternal freedom- but the day to day freedom of knowing that I am loved for who I am, just the way I am. Now that is a freeing thought. No need to strive to be like this person or that person. No need to compare myself with everyone else. No need to meet this person's expectations or else risk feeling less than...No, I am not perfect, but perfectly loved! As a guy I know said, "I can do no wrong." Really? That can't be true! Ah, but yes! Jesus is my Savior! If I could do wrong and change everything, then did Jesus really save me at all? Yes, I need saving from myself! When my son cries for me, do I leave him to cry or do I go to him and comfort him? When my son comes to sit on my lap do I refuse him or welcome him with open arms? When my son is disappointed with himself and feeling badly about what he did or didn't do, do I rub it in or do I tell him it will be okay? "If you being earthly know how to give good gifts, how much more does your heavenly father give to those who ask of Him?" My father is waiting for me to come to him, not so He can punish me, but so that He can truly love me and set me free!!
So, I am free to make mistakes and talk to God about why I did this or that...and I am free to love. Love freely just as He did for me. "Freely you have received, freely give!" I must freely receive before I can give...I want to know that divine "love that covers a multitude of sins." I want to know that love "that sets me free from the law of sin and death." I am desperate for the real Jesus. I am desperate to get to know Him as He really is...the divine romance that sweeps me in and sets me free. "I have come that you might have life and life more abundantly." "You will have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome the world." I want to walk with the lover of my soul
Once I really get the revelation downloaded into my mind, heart, and soul- lookout! I will be so completely changed that I will not be recognizable. I will be unoffendable. I will fail and not go into self pity and shame. I will be real- integrity- being true to who I am on the outside with who I am on the inside. Integrity is not about doing the right thing, it's about being real from the inside out. Authenticity! This is me, nothing to hide, because I am the daughter of God. I have great purpose and meaning in my life because God put me here on this earth for a reason. I may not always know or understand what it is, but God knows and I can trust Him.
The religious spirit is insidious. It is a false relationship. It is not authenticity. It appears to be one thing on the outside, but is something totally different on the inside. It is fake. It is not life-giving. It is ugly. It brings judgement. It takes away freedom. "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Do not be burdened again by a yoke a slavery." Why would Christ say this? Would Christ set us free only to become enslaved again to the law once we were saved? That would be ridiculous! That would be stupid! If we are expecting accolades, compliments, etcetera while serving, are we truly serving or feeding our egos? Servants just do their master's bidding- because that is what is expected! Slavery is not glamorous! It is dirty. It is monotonous. It can be boring. Satan uses whatever he can to keep us from a true, authentic relationship with our loving and good God. He will use temptations of all sorts, whichever ones appeal to us the most...pleasures, money, power, fame, even our desire to get it right. It is not about being right or getting it right, it is about coming to Christ, not just the first time when we give our hearts over to Christ on that day of salvation when we accepted Christ initially, no, but, coming to Christ again, and again, and again, in a loving relationship with Him. He wants to be wanted as John and Stasi Eldridge say in their book "Captivating." What a thought, He waits to be wanted...by me? I think why would He want me? I mean really want me? Somehow I don't think I am good enough to come to Him (and I am right, I am not, but Christ has already made a way where there seemed to be no way.) I think surely God wants Becki, Jayne, or Dave....but me? Yes, me! In all my idiosyncrasies...in all my weirdness...in my nerdness...all of me. Wow, if I could only get this deep in my heart of hearts.
A prayer I often pray is, "Lord, help me to see who You really are, not who I think You are, an idol of my own making." My view of God has been distorted for a very, very long time and I want to know the love and freedom that He has for me. How have I missed all the passages in His word about His love for me before? Before when I did hear them or read them they would bounce off like a trampoline, but they wouldn't get inside where they would change me, truly change me. Where they would change the way I see myself, my God, and everyone else around me. When I understand His love then I really understand His grace as well because they both go together like a hand in glove. And when I understand His love and grace it is then that I understand the freedom that He has purchased for me, not just the eternal freedom- but the day to day freedom of knowing that I am loved for who I am, just the way I am. Now that is a freeing thought. No need to strive to be like this person or that person. No need to compare myself with everyone else. No need to meet this person's expectations or else risk feeling less than...No, I am not perfect, but perfectly loved! As a guy I know said, "I can do no wrong." Really? That can't be true! Ah, but yes! Jesus is my Savior! If I could do wrong and change everything, then did Jesus really save me at all? Yes, I need saving from myself! When my son cries for me, do I leave him to cry or do I go to him and comfort him? When my son comes to sit on my lap do I refuse him or welcome him with open arms? When my son is disappointed with himself and feeling badly about what he did or didn't do, do I rub it in or do I tell him it will be okay? "If you being earthly know how to give good gifts, how much more does your heavenly father give to those who ask of Him?" My father is waiting for me to come to him, not so He can punish me, but so that He can truly love me and set me free!!
So, I am free to make mistakes and talk to God about why I did this or that...and I am free to love. Love freely just as He did for me. "Freely you have received, freely give!" I must freely receive before I can give...I want to know that divine "love that covers a multitude of sins." I want to know that love "that sets me free from the law of sin and death." I am desperate for the real Jesus. I am desperate to get to know Him as He really is...the divine romance that sweeps me in and sets me free. "I have come that you might have life and life more abundantly." "You will have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome the world." I want to walk with the lover of my soul
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