BEING FRIENDS

My name is Alyssa and I just turned fourteen-years-old last November.  We live on a farm in Vermont.  My friend, Sarah lives close by, past the slough, on

Smith Road

.  We have another neighbor named Tanya who lives a few doors down.  We ride the bus together every morning and afternoon and when we get home we often do crafts together, ride horses, or just hang out.

One day this past summer we had an incident.  I’m not even sure how it all started, but I was on the phone with Tanya and out of nowhere she blurts out to me that my friend Sarah thought I was fat!  We had been friends forever and I couldn’t figure out what had gotten into her.  And, why would Tanya tell me a thing like that?  I was so disappointed that she would think that about me, I felt crushed and humiliated, like an old piece of fruit on a dirty sidewalk.  I didn’t want to speak to Sarah and so I didn’t for days.    

When I would see her at school I would avoid her at all costs, duck into the restroom or hide behind my locker door.  Then one day she cornered me at my locker when I was looking through my backpack to find my notebook for my next class…

”What’s gotten into you Alyssa?”  “I haven’t talked to you in days; you have been avoiding me since last Monday, what’s up?” 

I could feel my heart pounding and my face getting red, but I told her I was just fine. 

“You’re not fine, Alyssa, I can see that, what’s eating at you anyway?” 

All of a sudden I couldn’t hold it in any longer and I blurted out in a rush, “Tanya told me that you said I was fat!”

  “What?” 

“That’s ridiculous!  I never said any such thing!  You didn’t?”                 

   ”No!”  

I just stood there trying to figure it all out.  I ran all the way home from the bus stop and flew into the kitchen.  Mom had some warm cookies that she had just finished baking so I sat down at the kitchen table to have one.  I was quiet when mom interrupted my thoughts and asked me how my day was. 

“Fine,” I said, not really looking at her, my eyes down at my feet.

“Is there something you need to talk about?”  Mom asked as she took opened the oven door to check on the biscuits.

“Well, Tanya told me that Sarah said I was fat and then I talked to Sarah today and she said she never said that. I don’t get it, why would she say something like that?”

“Maybe she’s jealous.”

 “What would she be jealous about?”

 “I don’t know, but you aren’t fat, honey.  You’ll get it all worked out, I just know it.” 

Mom took the biscuits out of the oven and I ran up to my room to change my clothes.  My job was to brush our horse, Runner Up, and then help with cleaning up after dinner.  As I was putting on my work clothes, I looked in the mirror.  Gosh, I am looking a little chubby.   I better have only half a biscuit for dinner and no more after school cookies either.  

I ran downstairs to get Runner up brushed and I breathed a quick prayer that God would help me with this situation. As the kitchen door slammed behind me I looked up and there was none other than Tanya! 

“Tanya, what are you doing here?  I asked. 

“I thought I’d come and see what you were up to.”

 “Oh, I’m just doin’ chores.”  I wasn’t nearly as talkative as usual given the situation.  She followed me into the barn and sat on a bale of hay while I proceeded to brush my horse.  I could tell that she wanted to say something.  

“Alyssa, I need to apologize.”

 I concentrated on brushing Runner Up, I really didn’t want to look Tanya in the eye.  When she started to apologize, I turned toward her.

 “I was wrong in what I said to you on the phone the other day.  I told you that Sarah had said you were fat, but that wasn’t true.  I made it up.” 

“Why would you make something like that up?”  

“I guess I was feeling jealous.” 

            “Jealous?”

 “I was afraid that you would want to hang out with Sarah more than me and so I figured if I said she said something mean, you wouldn’t want to hang out with her so much and you’d want to hang out with me more.  I wasn’t very nice, I was wrong, I’m sorry.  I know that you and Sarah are ‘best friends’ and I wish that we could be too.” 

“Oh Tanya, we are, we are!  Our friendship is different, because every friendship is different, but you are a very good friend and nothing is going to change that! You and I enjoy so many fun things like horses and art and just hanging out.  I wouldn’t want to lose that!”

“Will you forgive me, Alyssa?” 

“You’re forgiven Tanya.”  Alyssa said smiling warmly.  “Tanya, how about staying over for dinner tonight, my Mom has made some homemade buttermilk biscuits and we could share one along with the chicken dinner?”

“I’d like that, let me call my Mom and see if it’s okay with her.” 

“Cool, thanks Alyssa, you’re a good friend.” 

“You are too Tanya!” 

“Hey, how about we call Sarah and see what she is up to, it would be fun to play games after dinner since it’s not a school night, maybe our parent’s would even let us have a slumber party at my house,” said Alyssa excitedly.

“Oh, that would be so much fun.  You call Sarah, Alyssa, and I will call my Mom and see if it’s okay.” 

“Okay, we better be quick before my Mom calls us for dinner…”

Reminders of Beauty

Reminders of Beauty

When I was about twelve-years-old our family lived on an old farm on

Button Bay State Park Road

in Vermont.  The Green Mountain State as it is called is an idyllic place to engage the senses with the beauty of rolling hills, the earthy smell of pungent manure, colorful fall leaves of reds, yellows, and oranges from the maple trees.  In addition there were old farmhouses dressed in wooden clapboards and contrasting shutters that had been standing like sentries of colonial America. 

I think it is there that I learned to love riding bikes.  My bike was a red three speed, a "blue light special" as some obnoxious and irritating kids had informed me while I was going to the laundromat with a big black trash bag full of laundry balancing on my handlebars a few years before.  I didn't care though; it gave me freedom to roam as far as I could pedal.  Right before I took a left out of our driveway I would say hi to #326, a Holstein cow.  The ol' gal and I had an understanding, she would listen and I would talk her ear off.  I loved to ride along and see the meadows and trees lining my way.  I would frequently ride after school and enjoy the fresh air blowing through my hair as I sped along as fast as my little legs would take me.  I could bike for miles and miles and would often go and go just to see what was around the next bend or just to see how many miles I could conquer.  One of my favorite places to stop and linger was on the left side of our road probably about two miles away from our house or just down the road a piece as they say in Vermont.  After passing quaint farm houses, a run down green house and a corral of horses, my turn would come.  It was a long winding dirt road with parallel well worn dirt tire tracks with a grassy center that led right to the edge of the water.  It was always my secret place to sing, talk to God, to read and admire the beauty that He had created.  I saw sparrows and blue jays flit here and there chirping and cawing as they went.  Long grasses would sway in the gentle breeze.  Sometimes the muted blues of the water would meld into the dramatic blues and grays of the cloudy sky, it made me think of a painting, the artist, the Creator of the earth.  I would sit and delight in the peace for as long as possible.  I watched the pinks and oranges of the sunset over the water with the backdrop of the rolling hills and then would ride like the wind to get back home before the chill and darkness of night would set in.  Ahhhhh, it is there I was reminded of beauty again…

The Adoption Decree

So, this past Wednesday our foster son became our adopted son simply by the decree of a judge in a court room.  He asked my husband and I if we were willling to take on the responsibility for this child now and forever into the future.  We have been caring and raising our son since April 16, 2010 and this official decree took place on December 29, 2010.  He is now officially our heir.  He now has all rights as our son!

So many parallels with our relationship with our God.  We are the children of God, but it is not until we receive Christ that God (the judge) honors what Christ has done on our behalf and then calls us the children of God.  He decrees it.  He takes full responsibility for us at that point.  Even when we mess up, fail, and do do stupid stuff...he is still our father and we are still his children.  We receive all the benefits of being called the children of God.  Eternal life.  The abundant life.  Provision.  Peace.  Inner joy.

Being a parent sure has given me a greater glimpse into the heart of God for his children!  I think about my son...when he does something wrong at nine months old, do I think, "you should have known better."  No!  I realize that he has a  lot of growing up and learning to do.  He is immature.  I do not expect him to act like an adult at this age...I give him grace and patiently teach him what he needs to learn step by step.  That is what our father does for us!  He knows that we are dust.  He knows our frailities and is not surprised when we fall down, fail, make horrific blunders...he knows we have a lot of growing up to do.  He knows that we still need to mature in our faith and is willing to take us by the hand step by step and patiently teach us a different way.  Wow, that amazes me that the God of the universe would take that kind of time with me and tenderly lead me where I need to go...

Just as my son does not ask where his next meal is going to come from and how are we going to afford it and how are we going to keep this roof over our heads...he trusts to the point that it never even enters his mind.  Do we trust our father like that?  Completely...implicitly...totally?  He is fully trustworthy!  Think of that scripture that says if you give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly father give good gifts to you?  The lilies of the field do not toil, but yet they are arrayed in splendor that even King Solomon could not rival...wow!  When we really, really get it...it will blow our mind!

The Cross

I am reading the book of Colossians and have remained there for some time.  I keep re-reading it over and over...there is so much in there!  Here, I will write my thoughts of the truths that I am seeing...

So, Paul is an apostle of Jesus by the will of God.  We are in His kingdom by His will!  This is not by happenstance!  We are chosen.  We are loved.  In verse 5 Paul talks about "the faith and love that spring from the hope that is stored up for you (me, us) in heaven."  We have hope because we know where we are going.  We know our final destination.  We have a purpose for the journey when we know where we will end up.  It gives us direction.  It tells us who to follow in order to get there, Jesus.  It says later in the text that Jesus is the firstborn of from among the dead (vs 18).  So, He is the one that points us to our home.  This gives us hope when we are struggling.  When we are hurting and in pain.  When we don't understand.  We still have hope and we know who to look to to get us home.  Not only does He show us the way, but He also provides the way, "He is the way, the truth, and the life.  No one comes to the father except through me."  He is our hope. 

"All over the world this gospel is bearing fruit and growing..."  What is the gospel, it the GOOD NEWS of Jesus.  He has provided us with a way to escape our sin and the result of our sin by taking our sin upon Himself and acquitting us.  Taking our guilt from off of us and putting it on Himself.  I, for one, cannot save myself.  I have seen the messes that I get myself in by trying to do things in my own understanding, which is faulty and skewed to my self.  I have tried to change different destructive patterns in my life to no avail.  I have no power to save myself apart from the one that created me and empowers me to change by His Spirit.  The cross was the greatest triumph in the spiritual realm.  It may have appeared to be a stupid plan, a ridiculous plan, and maybe even a destructive or senseless plan.  Satan thought he had God now, that he won because Christ was destroyed, annihilated, done away with.  He did not bank on the fact that Jesus would rise from the dead conquering death itself.  What appeared to be one of the greatest tragedies of all, brought life to the world and defeated satan's plan and death itself.  This is true in our lives as well.  Some of the greatest hardships, the most terrible tragedies, and horrible situations- our "crosses" bring about some of the most victorious moments.  The strength of the human spirit that is filled with the love of Christ.  Forgiveness, peace in spite of pain, deep joy even in great despair, none can be explained in human terms, only in the redeeming work and triumph of The Cross!  We see news all around us of the heinous crimes being committed often against Christians in many countries- the oppression of believers in China, Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, etcetera and yet their blood cries out for justice, their prayers and the prayers of those left behind do not go unheeded by their Father God!  Out of these circumstances, the gospel is bearing more fruit and growing more than it would have in great peace.  Think about the actual Bible and how it is one of the only books that has survived throughout the ages, "God's word does not return void."  Truly, it is still here in spite of years of persecution of it's believers and many who would like to destroy it.  That alone is a miracle beyond understanding! 

The next few verses focus on the prayers that Paul prayed for the Colossians.  Prayers that we would do well to pray for those that we love as well.  First he says that, "we have not stopped praying for you..."  Wow!  Wouldn't we all love to know that there is someone out there who has not stopped praying for us.  Have you ever noticed that most unbelievers are still agreeable and comforted to know that someone is praying for them?  We all need to know that someone would take the time to pray for us and to know that there is someone greater than us looking out for us!  We do have someone who will never stop praying for us and that is Jesus Himself.  He is our personal intercessor...mediating on our behalf.  We cannot ask for a better intercessor than that! 

So, what did Paul pray for the Colossians? 
1.  That you may live a life worthy of the Lord
2.  That you may please Him in every way.
3.  That you may bear fruit in every good work;
4.  That you may grow in the knowledge of God;
5.  That you may be strengthened with all power according to His glorious might;
6.  So that you may have great endurance and patience;
7.  And joyfully give thanks to the Father who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the
           kingdom of light.
8. That you would remember that He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us            into      the kingdom of the Son he loves.
9. In whom we have redemption and the forgiveness of sins.

Do you want those things?  Sometimes it is just that we don't think we are worthy or we can't live up to God's expectations.  I was thinking yesterday how we don't have to be perfect for God- He already knows us better than anyone else does and He is not surprised by the things we do or say- in fact, He already knows what we are going to do or say.  He knows already that we are not perfect.  It's like when you have a child and they act like a child because they are immature.  As a parent, you expect your child to be immature...you don't expect them to be perfect...do you love them less?  No!  You expect this and you patiently teach them!  They learn through failures don't they?  Just like us, God's children.  We are called children for a reason!  We have much to learn...

As far as worthy...we are not...that's why Jesus came, to proclaim us worthy by His sacrifice!  He made a way when there seemed like there would be no way!  He is a miracle worker like that- He can make streams in the desert, He is God!  We have to believe that we are now worthy because of what Christ has done.  We do not have to walk with our head hanging and our feet dragging.  We are worthy just because Christ said so!  The only thing that we need to do is believe it!  (As easy and as hard as that).  The beautiful thing is that Christ helps us from start to finish...He softens our hearts, helps us believe, and sustains us through it all.  That list is definitely what I have prayed for myself many times...to just get all that Christ has done on my behalf.  I am convinced that is we really, really believe who God says He is and believe everything that He says, our lives would look radically different.  Our lives would exhibit less self-pity, less fear of man and less fear in general, less self-interest, less wasted time, etcetera.  If we truly believed in the power of prayer, wouldn't our prayers be more frequent, more fervent, more fiery?  Do we really believe what we say believe?  Why does our life resemble the lives of those around us so much? Shouldn't we stand out that people would see something that makes us "shine like stars in a wicked and perverse generation?